“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
There’s a small bowl on a table in our home. The bowl shows a couple who appear blissfully in love; to their side are six red hearts.
When I turn the bowl, there’s an artist etching reading, “The secret of a long marriage is to put a little romance in every day.” It’s signed, “Mary.”
I don’t know Mary but I’d like to meet her, and thank her for crafting the most perfect of gifts. Joyce and I love her bowl with its advice for keeping our love alive over all these years.
As we talked further, I’d offer Mary a commission for a dozen similar bowls. The new bowls would show two friends, sitting at a small table, talking over tea. I’ll ask her to etch the bottom, “The secret to every lasting relationship is in putting a few drops of kindness in the cup.”
Valentine’s Day comes in February. Then, six months later, we get Friends Day. That’s two days each year to celebrate love and friendship. It’s a beginning but it doesn’t need to be the end.
I don’t need an industry to tell me when to be nice. Instead, I’m going to tell the people I love how much I love them – saying it soft or loud. And I’m going to say it often.
For my friends, I’ll embrace them as well, by saying, “I’m glad we are friends.” I’ll invite them to tea and offer one of Mary’s new bowls.
Do you have the perfect number of friends? What’s the difference between two many and too few?
If you’d like to join me for tea, then Choices Do Matter can always be our special place; we can meet whenever you’d like. The tea will be real, along with the conversation, plus we each get our choice for the favorite spot.
Epilogue
Remember the excitement in school when the teacher said it was time for the class to swap Valentine’s Day cards? I sure do. At my age, I’m thinking how excited I’d be if I were surrounded by children handing me cards and offering their little hugs.
Maybe we could bring that back. We could gather our friends, buy colored paper and a few bright pens, then make “Secret Admirer” cards.
Watch this video and then let’s talk about changing the story.
Your post made me reflect and smile on several notes. My favorite was this memory… I had a bumper crop of daisy’s and at the time the cutest three year old girl with a brightly colored bow in her hair and a beautiful dress on. We gathered the flowers and drove to the retirement home near us. I walked her through the hall ways handing out daisy’s to all we found in the hallways and common areas…what a beautiful day we had created. Thank you for bringing that memory with you post. Tea or coffee anytime for a conversation 😉
Hi Frances,
What a wonderful memory. I know the daisy’s brought a smile to everyone’s face on that day, just as your story makes me smile today. We need to have more moments where we have an idea and then ‘just do it’ – life’s too short as is, so these moments are precious.
Yes, tea would be great – then you can help me find Mary so she can craft us some bowls.
– Bruce
Love this.
Thank you, Deanna.
Stop by anytime for a chat.
– Bruce